Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I see through liars

What are some alternatives to wearing a bra? Why do some women feel pressure to wear bras even though there may not be any benefits?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

How can I watch porn on TikTok?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

When was the last time you had sex with someone much older than yourself?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Circle IPO soars, giving hope to more startups waiting to go public - TechCrunch

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I understand how hurricane paths work

Is it possible for humans to determine their past life as an animal? Is there a scientific method to prove this?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

What is the rudest/meanest thing a family member has said to you?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t buy bullshit

Which animal has the best sense of smell? - Live Science

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Why did Cartman love Heidi purely with heart, her being the first one he ever did, but then one day Butters tells him that all women are manipulative and then he began to believe that she was a bad person and pretended to be a victim?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Shiba Inu risks 18% drop, but whales keep buying – What do they know? - AMBCrypto

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I actually pay taxes

Eagles star Saquon Barkley stunningly hints he could retire ‘out of nowhere’ - New York Post

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

With so much evidence supporting the flat Earth theory, why aren't more resources dedicated to studying it?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I can count

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I can read

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I have a reading level above third grade

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t